Ladies, Do You Hate Your Body?

by Heather Long | More from this Blogger

15 Aug 2006 12:30 PM

I have a confession to make - I am not particularly fond of my body. It's not the exact shape I'd like it to be. It doesn't look like all those size 4 actresses on television and I'm not as tall as I'd like to be. One of my eyes squints funny when I smile and my teeth are not all straight. As a youngster, my parents invested in eyeglasses and eye surgery rather than dental work.

So like many women, I fall into the category of hating my body because I was not taught to love it and I wasn't taught to appreciate myself. We can look at all the pop culture images around us and blame them, but most of the time - those women we see on television and in magazine ads are more like us than we might care to admit.

Understanding Negative Messages

We're conditioned from childhood on our body image. Our parents set the bar when they comment on our appearance. Did your parents tell you how beautiful you were or did they criticize everything from the clothing choices you made to the size of your body?

Were your parents conscious of their own appearance to the point that while you thought they were the most beautiful people on the planet, they dispelled that as you being silly? I remember telling my mother once that I thought she was really pretty and she laughed at me and told me that I was biased. At the time, everyone we knew used to tell me how much I looked like my mother, since she dismissed how she looked, I figured I couldn't look that great - after all - didn't I look just like her?

Changing The Way We See It

It's important to not look in the mirror and hate yourself. It's even more important when you are a parent. Remember, your little ones are looking up at you and they know they look like Mommy and Daddy - so if you are so convinced about how bad you look - chances are you are teaching your son or daughter to hate how they look too.

So think about changing the way you see it - and remember - beauty is not skin deep - it's a combination of who you are and who you want to be that determines how beautiful you are - not just what you see reflected in the bathroom mirror.

Do you hate your body?

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Learn more about Heather Long

Heather Long is 35 years old and currently lives in Wylie, Texas. She has been a freelance writer for six years. Her husband and she met while working together at America Online over ten years ago.

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Brandie (1720) 15 Aug 2006 01:33 PM

Yep ... I look in the mirror and usually hate what I see ... a body out of proportion, stretch marks, crooked teeth that do not sparkle, etc, etc. But I recently came to a realization that all that was okay. And I also blame a lot of on woman's appearal - if your body isn't exactly one perfect shape, many clothes can make you look bad. Our bodies come in so many shapes and sizes and I don't think the clothing industry has realized that. Anyway .... I won't rant about that! But I will remember that the next time my daughters tell my I look beautiful I will hug them and say thank-you with a big smile instead of saying I don't think so, but thanks anyway in that unsure voice of mine!

Sheri Fresonke Harper (4092) 15 Aug 2006 02:18 PM

Although, I do think it is important to give myself an honest assessment, otherwise I don't think I'd do the work necessary to stay in shape and healthy. Somehow seeing my wideness reminds me not to eat that next ice cream bar.

Heather Long (16954) 15 Aug 2006 02:35 PM

Valid points from both of you ladies and I agree -- but it's important to always remember that your physical beauty or shape is only a part of the equation -- in fact, I've heard my husband tell me how terrible he looks compared to when he was in his early 20s, but I still find him very attractive -- so I guess love does soften the lens -- so to speak.

Brandie (1720) 16 Aug 2006 07:29 AM

I do think having an honest assessment is good. But I know very few ladies who have an "honest" assessment. Most people look in the mirror and see an extra 2 inches all around. I think most people are overly critical of themselves and so do not have a honest (or healthy) self-assessment of themselves.